Monthly Archives: November 2002

the best gifts…

…are the ones you don’t expect.

they come out of the blue, like pennies from heaven. sometimes they’re big, but often they’re small, maybe so small that their importance doesn’t rise above the daily noise of existence (sleep, work, eat, work, repeat). i often forget to take off the headphones and listen for those small treasures, and even more often i forget to give them. after today, i will think twice, perhaps even thrice…

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sound bites

try to encapsulate your entire professional career into a 30-second sound bite. you’re about to give a pitch to a multi-billion-dollar company, and the entire deal could hinge on it. make sure you get all of that relevant experience in there (just to demonstrate that you can add value), and maybe throw in a joke so you don’t sound like a piece of talking luggage.


(what, you’re not done yet?)

crash position

“ladies and gentlemen, due to a sudden change in cockpit personnel, emergency oxygen masks have been deployed for your use. your new republican pilots will do everything within their power to stop the out-of-control descent of this aircraft, but under the weight of defense spending, growing budget deficits, foreign policy gaffes, and misguided leadership, we’re pretty sure this bad boy is goin’ down.

thank you for flying American Airlines! we hope you’ve enjoyed your flight, and will come fly with us again soon!”

(flight attendant blows explosive bolts on exit door, at which point the plane depressurizes and she and remaining crew jump from aircraft with parachutes. passengers who voted for the cockpit personnel change are wearing broad smiles, with their fingers in their ears and their eyes closed; passengers who did not vote for the change look wide-eyed and confused, democratic deer caught in GOP headlights.)

can i vote “maybe”?

free and open elections are the pinnacle of democracy. it is a right that we are given by our government, a gesture of trust that says we, the people, should and must have a voice in the way our society is governed. and the faintest whisper counts just as much as the loudest scream – a single vote can affect the fate of millions.

there’s only one problem: you have to figure out who, and what, to vote for…

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